The Perfect Christmas Gift

This Christmas give your child “the perfect Christmas gift”: Your Blessing!  According the Church’s official book on blessings Jesus loved blessing children for when God took on our human flesh he, “Gave us a new gift in every blessing.” (Book of Blessings # 2,3) Even when Jesus was most exhausted and the apostles wanted him to rest, He would rise to bequeath this special gift of blessing children. (Matt.19:15; Mk.10:16 & Lk.18:16)

We know that bishops, priests, and deacons can bless children since they receive the Sacrament of Holy Orders, but can parents bless their children and is that blessing real, officially permitted, and effectual?  The answer is yes, yes and yes; however, keep in mind that, “The source from whom every good gift comes is God, who is above all, blessed forever…so that he might fill his creatures with blessings.” Book of Blessings # 1

The Catechism of the Catholic Church says that “every baptized person is called to bless” (1669) while the Book of Blessings # 18 further explains, “Laymen and laywomen, in virtue of the universal priesthood, a dignity they possess because of their baptism and confirmation, may celebrate certain blessings for example parents on behalf of their children.” Pope Frances also puts a blessing in the context of a gift, “The good things we give to each other.”

Pope Francis further explains that, “A blessing is a word spoken with love, at times given with a laying of hands on one’s head, or marking one’s forehead with a cross.”  This “marking one’s forehead with a cross” is one of the fondest memories from this author’s childhood when my parents would bless their seven children with such great love and attentiveness.  An action that I have continued with my 18 year old daughter, Daisy, since infancy years and one that I still value even now as an adult when I go and see my 85 year old mother who blesses me as when I was a little boy and I in turn bless her as a deacon.

Pope Francis reminds us that the, “Blessing transforms and opens our eyes to the profound sense they contain.”  In scripture Jacob knew the “profound sense” of getting his father’s (Isaac) blessing even at the cost of deceiving him to receive that “final gift” of Jewish blessing (Gen. 27:18-29).  Jacob blesses his twelve sons before he dies, and they become the twelve tribes of Israel. (Gen. 49)  Keeping in mind that Abraham had first passed this blessing to his son Isaac (Gen. 25:5).  Earlier in Genesis, Noah had passed on the parental blessing to Shem and Japhepth (Gen. 10: 26-27).   Today, in our fast paced world, we have totally missed the understanding and truth of a parent’s blessing.  We have lost sight that a parent’s blessing, “Implores divine grace” (Book of Blessings # 12) from on high every day of the year if it is conferred daily.  Pope Francis regrets that today, “To offer blessings to one another is something we lack in our life.”

There are two types of blessings.  A constitutive blessing signifies the permanent sanctification and dedication of a person or thing for some sacred purpose.. Examples of a constitutive blessing would be the consecration of St. Vincent de Paul Catholic Church in Austin, a blessing of a religious sister when taking vows, or the blessing of a rosary.  An invocative blessing is one in which the minister implores divine favor on person/s or events like the blessing of children by their parents or a blessing by a cleric when the faithful undertake a special trip. Both types of blessings remind us that, “His blessing was always a promise of divine help, a proclamation of His favor, and a reassurance of His faithfulness to the covenant He had made with His people.” Book of Blessings # 6

How should parents bless their children?  In scripture Jesus blesses the children by the laying on of hands while Jacob (grandpa) blesses Joseph’s children by crossing his arms in the form of cross and the laying on of hands which was a prefiguration of the sign of the cross that is used in today’s blessings.  The Book of Blessings gives many gestures of blessings from the raising of the hands to using incense depending on who is blessing and if it is a person or a thing that is being blessed but more specifically it explains that parents should bless their children by tracing the sign of the Cross on the forehead.  The Church does however clarify, “The more a blessing concerns ecclesial and sacramental life, the more is its administration reserved to the ordained ministry which is a bishop, priests, or deacon.” CCC 1669

The Vatican’s retired chief exorcist, Fr. Gabriel Amorth explains that today more than ever evil is always trying to attack our children via the violent and esoteric culture of death with evil elements found in certain movies, video games, board games, and books on magic.  He expounds that from his experience children are more vulnerable because they are young in their faith, naïve to evil, and very trusting.  He recommends to parents that every night they should bless their children by dipping their thumb in holy water and then tracing the sign of the Cross on the forehead to protect them from the daily attacks of the enemy. The Book of Blessings # 11 affirms this when it says, that a blessing acts by “imploring favors from Him (God) and on restraining the power of evil.”

Pope Benedict XVI (before he became pope) remembers the childhood blessing he would receive from his parents and the significance of bringing it back into society, “Through the Cross, we can become sources of blessing for one another.  I shall never forget the devotion and heartfelt care with which my father and mother made the sign of the Cross on the forehead, mouth, and breast of us children when we went away from home, especially when the parting was a long one.  This blessing is like an escort that we knew would guide us on our way.  It made visible the prayer of our parents, which went with us, and it gave us the assurance that this prayer was supported by the blessing of the Savior.  The blessing was also a challenge to us not to go outside the sphere of this blessing.  Blessing is a priestly gesture, and so in this sign of the Cross we felt the priesthood of parents, its special dignity and power.  I believe that this blessing, which is a perfect expression of the common priesthood of the baptized, should come back in a much stronger way into our daily life and permeate it with the power of the love that comes from the Lord.” (Spirit of the Liturgy by Joseph Cardinal Ratzinger)

Whatever circumstances we may find ourselves in this Christmas, let us be like the blind and elder Tobit who courageously stands up and weeping blesses his son Tobiah (Tob. 9:6) with a blessing that confers, “The outpouring of many gifts.” Book of Blessings # 5.   For in the gift of conferring a blessing, “We get to act like God, and we get to feel like God,” says Fr. Ron Rolheiser, OMI

This Christmas let us be the good son or daughter who like St. Thomas More (1535), who even though he held the second highest position in England as Lord Chancellor, would kneel in front of everyone at Westminster Hall to get his father’s blessing as he passed his father’s bench at court.  This Christmas let us rediscover this “perfect Christmas gift” and take up our duty as parents more seriously, knowing that God has authorized every parent with a unique blessing of imploring divine favor even though, “You may not be rich; you may be unable to bequeath any great possessions to your children; but one thing you can give them is the heritage of your blessing. And it is better to be blessed than to be rich.” St. Ambrose. (397 AD)