I am not sure that men and women will ever truly understand one another. I am a woman of faith, though, so I know that there are some things I accept and believe without understanding them; they’re called mysteries. Similarly, I can’t quite pin down why I had such a different reaction to Wild at Heart than I did to Captivating, but I’ll try to explain anyway.
photo by MiRo740
John Eldredge’s Wild at Heart is not his first book on Christian spirituality, but it is arguably the best-known. It focuses on male spirituality; Captivating was written by Eldredge and his wife to complement Wild at Heart. I discovered as I read it, though, that despite still lacking some of the fundamental balance between the sexes one might find in the theology of the body, Wild at Heart presents a much more balanced approach to understanding the way Christian men experience God.
Aside from rarely mentioning the arts and openly disparaging a career-focused businessman early in the text, Eldredge manages to keep his observations of men broad yet pointed. He correctly notes that many Christian men have been told that they ought to be “nice guys”: don’t make waves, don’t get too close to anyone. Hearing this, they either shrink away from their calling to protect and defend or brush off that advice and lord their power over everyone else. Perhaps it is because I am a woman, so neither end really applies to me, but this division seemed less drastic than the meek/domineering dichotomy in Captivating.
As I mentioned in my last review, Eldredge characterizes men’s three goals as a battle to fight, an adventure to live, and a beauty to rescue. Here, the beauty must be a woman, and conveniently the battle and adventure often involve her as well. That seems problematic compared to his later conclusions. Perhaps his most important conclusion is that men must truly believe that they are men. They can only learn that from other men who tell them that they are no longer boys. They need other men to initiate them into manhood and to fight alongside them. They need fellow soldiers as they resist temptation and fight spiritual battles for themselves and those they must protect. If they don’t feel like men, they will turn to women instead of turning to God, the only one who can tell us who we truly are.
photo by Omar Bariffi
The consequences of not feeling like a man can be disastrous. Adam was supposed to protect Eve. Instead, he stood right by her side as she succumbed to confusion and temptation. He followed her into sin, but instead of turning to God for redemption, he and his woman both hid. Eldredge calls men to build relationships with other men; not to become women, but to rebuild a communal experience of manliness. It seems that men have only one goal: really, truly, deep within your heart, be a man. It was good enough for God.
Stylistically, not attempting to combine two points of view made this a much better book than Captivating. Group writing is almost always awful. Captivating also probably tried to be too much like “Wild at Heart for women” instead of having its own approach. Captivating tried to match instead of standing on its own. Having now read both of these books, I would recommend that men and women read Wild at Heart and take it into consideration as they try to build strong relationships to support good families with children who have been formed in the faith. Just be captivated with the wild heart.
Great review. I hadn’t heard a woman’s perspective on this book.
I read this book almost 8 years ago, and I really enjoyed it. It is lacking in many theology of the body elements, but really speaks to a man’s heart. Helps promote men to take their role seriously as men.
Funny; I thought that this was a Catholic forum. Why are you reviewing this watered down Evangelical tripe?!! To steer Catholic men into this resource might be a genuine disservice. While some of Eldredge’s ideas have merit. Overall, the book is a hollow piece of turn-of the-century Zeitgeist.
If you want to understand the real challenges of authentic Catholic men’s spirituality, please review Father Larry Richards’ book Be a Man! Any “guide” that doesn’t root itself firmly in the Eucharist will come up far short in really helping readers achieve true Catholic manhood.
I’m not sure if you noticed but Lindsay reviews lots of different things, in fact almost all are not specifically Catholic. Still, she takes it from a faithful Catholic perspective. This is important because we understand that most Catholics consume non-Catholic types of media. That media merits discussion in this group.
I understand your point, Chris. I am very much in favor of open, civil discussion and I don’t want to come across as combative. However, I am not certain that this review does anything to build authentic Catholic male spirituality (a topic near to my heart) and it appears to run counter to the fifth pillar in ACNM’s mission to “ensure our message is faithful and orthodox.”
When any review or post on ACNM comes close to appearing like an endorsement for this type of non-Catholic material, it veers away from the site’s faithful mission in the New Evangelization. Unfortunately, I am starting to notice this lack of orthodoxy creeping into a few of the newer posts appearing on this wonderful website and it really concerns me.
I am not against discussions of “non-Catholic types of media”, but let’s be abundantly clear about the inherent shortcomings of this material. Not having any foundation in the Holy Eucharist is as glaring a weakness as you are ever going to find and faulty omissions like that should be duly noted. Contributors should make absolutely certain that their submissions comply with ACNM’s stated mission and all posted material should be reviewed to ensure that it is “faithful and orthodox” or else this valuable website runs a very real risk of promoting catechesis that runs counter to the Magisterium of the Church.
Thank you for reading and for your suggestion of further reading of a great Catholic book.
Also, thank you for comments. We highly encourage our readers to hold us accountable to the teachings of the Truth. We hold this to be one of the most important parts of our mission.
We ask for your forgiveness if we have offended you.
Lindsay is a faithful Catholic and would never encourage approaching this media as educational on its own. While “Wild at Heart” is definitely lacking in the fullness of Truth, Catholics would naturally look at it and see it from a different perspective because of our Eucharistic center.
To Lindsay’s defense, she does mention that it’s biggest flaw is its understanding of theology of the body. Aside from that, this book does not present itself as a theological source, but rather a simple introduction and more entertainment. That being noted, we will look into a way to expand upon the theological flaws of this book.
First, let me apologize for not responding to your comment sooner. I try to keep up with the comments in response to my reviews, but I don’t always catch them.
Secondly, I sincerely apologize for offending you with my review of Wild at Heart, but I do not retract the recommendation. I agree that the Eucharist is the source and summit of the Catholic faith. As Cris points out, I also routinely review non-Catholic books, and here, I note that understanding Catholic theology (specifically the theology of the body) would have improved the book. However, I believe, as does the Church, that non-Catholic Christians in particular can teach Catholics some valuable lessons. Do evangelicals have the fullness of the truth? Without the Eucharist, no. Do they have some of the truth? Yes. Wild at Heart attempts to explain that limited vision of the truth, and it does so better than the counterpart book for women. That is the conclusion I drew in my review.
Thank you for your comment and for recommending Be a Man. I have heard great things about Fr. Richards’s book, and I look forward to reading it and reviewing it here at ACNM.
Not to split hairs but this statement “Do they (evangelicals) have some of the truth?” answers itself. Something is either wholly true or it is a lie. Half-Truths are lies. (10% lies and 90% truth are also lies). Eldredge’s theology stands on the sand of Protestantism and Humanism so the basis of all his statement no matter how close to the Truth, are built upon the basis of lies and more importantly the denial of Truth, via the Eucharist. There is a reason that there are so few non-catholic authors approved of by the Church, their foundation is not the rock of the Church.
Eldredge’s advice (as described) sounds less like a recipe for men and more like a recipe for weak men needing a support group. That sounds harsh but it is true, show me a Saint who required others to stand for the Truth, to fight? Or a Saint that needed other to validate them? Real men stand when other sit, the speak up when others are silent, regardless of the odds.
We live in an age of lies and half-truths, love is love, etc, Eldredge seems to be peddling the same-old anti-Catholic christian mystic views that lead many astray.
All that said you I like your writing style.