{"id":42252,"date":"2013-11-07T07:47:02","date_gmt":"2013-11-07T13:47:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.austincnm.com\/?p=42252"},"modified":"2013-11-07T08:56:53","modified_gmt":"2013-11-07T14:56:53","slug":"part-3-6-pope-francis-parenthood-questions","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/2013\/11\/part-3-6-pope-francis-parenthood-questions\/","title":{"rendered":"Part 3 of 6 &#8211; Pope Francis, Parenthood, and Questions"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.austincnm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/Pope-Francis-010.jpg\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-41640\" alt=\"Pope Francis\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.austincnm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/Pope-Francis-010-300x180.jpg?resize=300%2C180\" width=\"300\" height=\"180\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Another important tool for parents that we have learned from Pope Francis is the use of questions in our parenting. \u00a0In his interview with an atheist, when asked a question, Pope Francis responded with a question on several occasions. \u00a0We, as parents, can learn from this. \u00a0Questions are frequently the best response initially to a question or challenge from our children for several reasons:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>First, asking a question in response to a question <strong>helps a parent to clarify the question<\/strong> so that we answer what is really being asked. \u00a0A friend of ours shared a story when their 10 year old child walked into the room and asked him &#8220;What is sex?&#8221; \u00a0Instead of initially answering the question, our friend followed with a question &#8211; &#8220;Why do you ask?&#8221;. \u00a0The child responded, &#8220;Well, I&#8217;m filling out this form for school. \u00a0There is a section that says &#8220;Sex&#8221; with an &#8220;M&#8221; and an &#8220;F&#8221; next to it. \u00a0Which one do I check?&#8221; \u00a0Without asking the question, he might have begun to tell the young boy about the birds and the bees long before he was ready and when he really wasn&#8217;t asking for the information anyway.<\/li>\n<li>Second, asking a question <strong>helps our children learn how to begin to think like we think<\/strong>. \u00a0Ultimately, as parents, we want our children to be able to think critically about situations in which they find themselves as they grow older. \u00a0We should hope that thought process contains some semblance of our way of thinking. \u00a0One way to help form our children in our way of thinking is to answer a challenge to one of our decisions with a question. \u00a0For example, our older son loves to play X-Box. \u00a0We frequently struggled with him with regard to limiting the amount of time he spent on it. \u00a0During that struggle, this 16 year old would respond with a challenging question like, &#8220;Why does it matter to you how long I play? \u00a0I&#8217;ve done my home work. \u00a0I&#8217;m not interfering with anyone else. \u00a0Why can&#8217;t I play as long as I want?&#8221; \u00a0Now, we could have responded with citations from research regarding the effects of too much video game exposure. \u00a0Or, we could have answered with the always popular &#8220;because I said so!&#8221; \u00a0Or, even better, with the punishments that would come his way if he didn&#8217;t obey. \u00a0All of which we have used before. \u00a0However, the most effective response over time was to ask him, &#8220;Why do you think that we&#8217;re concerned about this?&#8221; or &#8220;Which would be easier for us, to let you continue playing quietly and not bothering anyone OR to be having this discussion?&#8221; \u00a0While these questions led to lengthy discussions, they also helped him begin to internalize our thought processes.<\/li>\n<li>Third, asking a question can <strong>help diffuse potential discipline issues. \u00a0<\/strong>Sometimes Mass, particularly with younger children, can be a source of discipline issues. \u00a0Instead of correcting the children in the middle of Mass, this week ask your kids this question &#8211; Can you help mom and dad come up with the 10 commandments for Mass? \u00a0We did this when our children were young and the results were amazing. \u00a0Often the &#8220;commandments&#8221; they came up with were more strict than ours. \u00a0In fact, sometimes we needed to actually tell them that they were a little over the top. \u00a0As parents, we directed the process, including asking them why this rule was a good rule and why that one may need to be changed a little. \u00a0Once we came up with these 10 commandments we worked on putting them on a piece of paper that came with us to Mass. \u00a0On the way to Mass, we would go over them together. \u00a0They loved it because these were their rules, their answers to our question. \u00a0As a result, they tended to follow them. \u00a0By \u00a0doing this, we avoided or at least limited the number of problems we had in Mass.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>So, next time, learn from Pope Francis. \u00a0Ask questions of your children. \u00a0You may be amazed at the results.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp; Another important tool for parents that we have learned from Pope Francis is the use of questions in our parenting. \u00a0In his interview with an atheist, when asked a question, Pope Francis responded with a question on several occasions. \u00a0We, as parents, can learn from this. \u00a0Questions are frequently the best response initially to&#8230;&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/2013\/11\/part-3-6-pope-francis-parenthood-questions\/\">[Read&nbsp;More]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":157,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"_wpas_customize_per_network":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[3,671],"tags":[1905,373,62,131,165,1505,2064],"class_list":{"0":"post-42252","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-acnm","7":"category-column","8":"tag-catholic-parenthood","9":"tag-discipline","10":"tag-evangelization","11":"tag-mass","12":"tag-parenting","13":"tag-pope-francis","14":"tag-using-questions","15":"entry"},"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":41875,"url":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/2013\/10\/pope-francis-and-parenthood\/","url_meta":{"origin":42252,"position":0},"title":"5 Things Pope Francis Can Teach Parents About Parenthood &#8211; Part 1 of 6","author":"Trey and Stephanie Cashion","date":"October 9, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Pope Francis has taught us quite a bit about parenthood. \u00a0In word and deed and in just the first six months as \"Papa\", his words and his actions have taught us and can teach any parent something about raising children. \u00a0Today, we'd like to share some of what we've learned\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Column&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Column","link":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/category\/acnm\/column\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Pope Francis and Holy Spirit","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.austincnm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/07\/Pope-Francis-and-HS-300x221.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":43762,"url":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/2014\/02\/four-attitudes-evangelical-parenthood-approachability-part-2\/","url_meta":{"origin":42252,"position":1},"title":"Four Attitudes of Evangelical Parenthood: Approachability &#8211; Part 2","author":"Trey and Stephanie Cashion","date":"February 13, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"In order to answer our parental vocation to evangelize our children, Pope Francis says we must be approachable to our kids. \u00a0We must develop and cultivate an attitude of approachability. \u00a0As a parent, you want your children coming to you to ask difficult questions, right?! \u00a0After all, if they don't\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Column&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Column","link":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/category\/acnm\/column\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Pope Francis","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.austincnm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/8562320076_7962a945e8_o-241x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":43618,"url":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/2014\/01\/four-attitudes-evangelical-parenthood\/","url_meta":{"origin":42252,"position":2},"title":"Four Attitudes of Evangelical Parenthood","author":"Trey and Stephanie Cashion","date":"January 30, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Parents are called to evangelize their children - to be evangelical parents. \u00a0Yet, all too frequently many of us fail to answer the call to share the \"Good News\" with them because we never preach the Gospel to our children. \u00a0We leave that to the priest in the Sunday homily\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Column&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Column","link":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/category\/acnm\/column\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Pope Francis","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.austincnm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/8562320076_7962a945e8_o-241x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":158215,"url":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/2015\/10\/family-faith-and-the-fall-college-app-craze\/","url_meta":{"origin":42252,"position":3},"title":"Family, Faith and the Fall College App Craze","author":"Rachel","date":"October 6, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"There are some big things happening right now in the world of the family in our culture. And as much as we are sons and daughters of God, we are also children of our time, swimming in the atmosphere of our every day environments. That's not a call to move\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Faith&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Faith","link":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/category\/acnm\/blog\/faith-blog\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"collegejpg","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.austincnm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/collegejpg-150x150.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":42971,"url":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/2013\/12\/pope-francis-parenthood-relationship\/","url_meta":{"origin":42252,"position":4},"title":"Pope Francis, Parenthood, and Relationship","author":"Trey and Stephanie Cashion","date":"December 19, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u00a0 The end of our parenting should be to build relationships with our children. \u00a0Without a relationship, teaching, questioning, admitting, and giving example - the topics addressed in the previous columns - become less effective. \u00a0This is part of the point the Pope Francis has been trying to make with\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Column&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Column","link":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/category\/acnm\/column\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Pope Francis","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.austincnm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/Pope-Francis-010-300x180.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":154956,"url":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/2015\/09\/mind-blown-top-quotes-from-pope-francis-visit-to-america\/","url_meta":{"origin":42252,"position":5},"title":"Mind Blown: Top Quotes from Pope Francis&#8217; Visit to America","author":"Britt Echtenkamp","date":"September 28, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Unless you're living under a rock\u00a0that doesn't get Wifi, you've heard about Pope Francis' visit to the United States of America. His visit was historic. It was inspiring. It was filled with surprises and joy and humility. Everything he said could be turned into a semester-long study on theology or\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;World and News&quot;","block_context":{"text":"World and News","link":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/category\/acnm\/blog\/news\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42252","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/157"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=42252"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42252\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=42252"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=42252"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=42252"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}