{"id":41949,"date":"2013-10-16T09:33:26","date_gmt":"2013-10-16T14:33:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.austincnm.com\/?p=41949"},"modified":"2013-10-16T11:24:48","modified_gmt":"2013-10-16T16:24:48","slug":"why-we-cant-stop-listening","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/2013\/10\/why-we-cant-stop-listening\/","title":{"rendered":"Why we can’t stop listening."},"content":{"rendered":"

\"why<\/a><\/p>\n

Back when I was in high school, I became close friends with two girls. They were Baptist. They taught me that God really loved me, that I could talk to Him like I talked to my best friend, and that most music played on the radio was evil.<\/p>\n

In fact, one friend went so far as to rip out all the tape from her secular cassettes and musically fasted for a year on Amy Grant and Steven Curtis Chapman.<\/p>\n

While I never was so bold as to toss my music, I sorta saw her point. For a while. \u2018Till, in later years when we all changed our minds again (as most teenagers do) and the floorboards of our cars were strewn with Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Spin Doctors, Belly and P.J. Harvey (don\u2019t ask), along with Indigo Girls, James Taylor, Cat Stevens and Crosby Stills Nash & Young.<\/p>\n

We prided ourselves in our diversity.<\/p>\n

We\u2019d roll down the windows of my un-airconditioned gray Honda and turn up the volume as loud as it could go, belting out lyrics on the way to and from school. Whatever had happened recently always related \u2013 a boy we liked, a boy we didn\u2019t like, a heart full, a heart broken. That music Mattered. So. Much.<\/p>\n

So, in recent years, as my children have gotten a bit older and interested in music, I\u2019ve wondered again. What DO we listen to? How should we handle this as parents. I know, very well, that music is powerful, and influences moods, increases emotions and even stirs up feelings that weren\u2019t really there to begin with. It\u2019s powerful stuff. It\u2019s worth giving attention to.<\/p>\n

After a three weekend love affair with our local community theatre\u2019s <\/a>production of Les Miserables, with my 7 year old running around the house, loudly singing \u201cLook DOWWWWN, look DOWWWWN\u2026\u201d, I decided I needed an emotional break from the heart-wrenching drama of Les Mis.<\/p>\n

So I popped on the radio in the car, on my way home from the store a few days ago. Alone. Thankfully. I do listen to the station fairly often. Mostly amused. Often singing along. Sometimes switching from the annoying, pointless and less-than-well-written stuff. Feeling old and not caring.<\/p>\n

And this newish song came on. \u2018The Other Side\u2019 by Jason Derulo.<\/p>\n

Catchy. He had a nice voice. Starts out singing about a nice girl, \u2018chilling in the photo booth\u2019 with him. Spending time \u2018talking all afternoon\u2019. Aw, how sweet, I thought, turning the corner into my neighborhood.<\/p>\n

And then this:<\/p>\n

\u2018Tonight we\u2019ll just get drunk
\nDisturb the peace
\nFind your hands all over me
\nAnd then you bite your lip
\nWhisper and say, \u201cWe\u2019re going all the way.\u201d \u2018<\/i><\/p>\n

But that\u2019s not all. That\u2019s not what made me snap my volume dial with one angry twitch of my wrist. It was this:<\/p>\n

\u201cThis could be perfect (yeah)
\nBut we won\u2019t know unless we try (try)
\nI know you\u2019re nervous
\nSo just sit back and let me drive\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n

YOU. HAVE. GOT. TO. BE. KIDDING. ME.<\/p>\n

\u2018Let\u2019s get drunk? Oh, you nervous? Just sit back and LET ME DRIVE???!!!\u2019<\/p>\n

And I had flashbacks of cassette tape ripping and the sugary sweet airy voice of Amy Grant and thought, \u201cMy God, what poor girl has listened to this song?\u201d<\/p>\n

And \u201cWho is this guy and where is his mother?! Jordan Sparks, what do YOU have to say about this?!” And \u201cDid not one single person in that recording studio think that maybe this isn\u2019t<\/b> okay? Certainly one of them has a daughter. Or a son.\u201d<\/p>\n

And \u201cWhy is<\/b> this okay? I\u2019m all about free speech and stuff, but \u2018hey young thing, let\u2019s go to the carnival, take pics in the photo booth, get drunk, and let me force myself on you while you\u2019re inebriated.\u2019? No<\/strong>.\u201d<\/p>\n

My anger over this song, and the many like it out there, has only risen over the past few days. I\u2019ve sought out a solution. I\u2019m a \u2018doer\u2019. There has to be something I can DO about this – a solution to protect my kids and every other one out there from this trash.<\/p>\n

But I have no answer.<\/p>\n

Except to be angry.<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t think I can go the route of exclusively playing Gregorian Chant for the next 15 years. Kids will hear music anyway. Pretending it doesn\u2019t exist isn\u2019t the answer. They\u2019ll grow up a bit, be more on their own and then go to college and have to deal then. I\u2019d rather be with them for a bit while they deal.<\/p>\n

So, what can I do? I can\u2019t go shake the sense into Jason Derulo or Mylie Cyrus. And if I did, there\u2019d be some other punk who\u2019d show up and take their place.<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t think there IS a simple answer, as much as I\u2019d like there to be.<\/p>\n

And maybe that\u2019s the point. If there WAS an easy answer \u2013 a one-click solution we could pop together and then let our kids move on \u2013 then we\u2019d stop paying attention.<\/p>\n

We\u2019d stop listening.<\/p>\n

We\u2019d stop wondering what it\u2019s like to be them, a 13 year old girl growing up in 2013. We\u2019d stop reflecting on the influence of the media, of their friends, of their clothes and what they read.<\/p>\n

We\u2019d stop paying attention.<\/p>\n

And even in the midst of all their adolescent angst, that’s really the LAST thing our kids want us to do.<\/p>\n

We parents have to be watchful. We have to know what\u2019s up. We have to connect and try to relate. We have to actually turn on that radio station and hear what\u2019s there. We have to find the good from the bad (and there is good out there, and people DO like it!) and point it out.<\/p>\n

And when we find ourselves in that magical moment, when the kid is sitting next to us in the car, and we\u2019ve had a good day, and they\u2019re actually in tune with us for once, then we go for it. We\u2019ll ask them if they\u2019ve heard this song (or whatever the issue of the day is). We\u2019ll ask them what they think. And we\u2019ll talk and share and open our hearts and be that anchor for them. Right then, on the way to the grocery store. \u00a0We\u2019ll teach them about beauty and show them, again and again, where to find it, how to love it and how it can overpower everything, even the awful lyrics of the latest Jason Derulo song.<\/p>\n

\n

‘Beauty is truth, truth beauty,’ – that is all ye know on earth, and all ye need to know. – John Keats<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n

 <\/p>\n

Oh, and – Hey Jason, If you ever want to talk, I’ve got plenty to say…<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Back when I was in high school, I became close friends with two girls. They were Baptist. They taught me that God really loved me, that I could talk to Him like I talked to my best friend, and that most music played on the radio was evil. In fact, one friend went so far… [Read More]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":98,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"{title}\n\n{excerpt}\n\n{url}","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"_wpas_customize_per_network":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[4,90,89,91,154],"tags":[2025,2029,2027,2026,2028,2030],"class_list":["post-41949","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","category-blog","category-faith-blog","category-family","category-young-adult","category-youth","tag-jason-derulo","tag-secular-music","tag-teens-and-music","tag-the-other-side","tag-the-power-of-music","tag-truth-and-beauty","entry","has-post-thumbnail"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":187431,"url":"https:\/\/atxcatholic.com\/index.php\/2015\/12\/popular-misconceptions-about-the-catholic-mass-part-i-music\/","url_meta":{"origin":41949,"position":0},"title":"Popular Misconceptions About the Catholic Mass, Part I: Music","author":"Michael Raia","date":"December 16, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"A number of\u00a0liturgical reforms seen in the U.S. since Vatican II were not actually mandated or even recommended\u00a0by the Council, but\u00a0were reactionary shifts that had more to do with the culture of the\u00a0decade\u00a0\u2013 it\u2019s time to revisit\u00a0those changes. 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